Christmas is a mere two weeks away and I have yet to buy a single present... now that we seem to be on schedule with what I had originally planned for the family, I might actually try to get out and do a little shopping... I've been taking stock of the blessings in our lives as we prepare to go to the Service of Remembrance and Healing tonight... I am fairly certain that I'll be attending but I don't want to keep crying... the irony is my life has been better overall since Chris has died... but if that's the case then why am I so frustrated with everything? My patience doesn't seem to be going as far as it used to and I feel like I'm snapping a bit more over things that don't really matter... there are a couple of pieces that I'm missing still that are taking longer than I would like them too, namely the hearing that we have next week and recovering his property for the kids... getting his girlfriend out of my life permanently would be a big weight off of my shoulders... I still cannot believe the audacity of this girl to be so selfish where his kids are concerned... all I can do is wait for the legal system to do its job... in the mean time I am at the gym most every day because it's the only place where I can drop the kids for a couple of hours and take care of myself... eventually I'll make use of their salon and spa but that will be after I get this month wrapped up... better days are still ahead...