I have finally taken the first real step to getting my life back... tonight I went out though the weather was going to take a nasty turn and went to the gym... a good friend of mine had mentioned our gym has a salsa class on Wednesday nights and since I have to pick up Jack from choir practice at 6 pm there's not a good excuse to not go... it leaves me with enough time to get in a small workout before the instructor puts us through the paces... my whole body aches but I feel good... it was also nice to be somewhere that nobody knew me or my situation so I didn't have to think about anything but putting my feet in the right places... I'm glad I went and hope the exercise gets me out of this funk... I'm tired of feeling blah... I can smile all I want and have fun during the day but the nights have been harder... I fell back into not being able to sleep before 2 or 3 am and my body just can't take that anymore... plus I need to stay fresh because my attorney called and informed me the girlfriend has her own representation and our motion will go to the judge on Monday... I am nervously excited about the possibilities of getting this over with as quickly I can... this is the last step of closing that chapter of my life... who knew that the start of my new decade would hold this much? I just pray that the rest of my thirties will be less dramatic...