Life has been a haze a allergy medications and kleenex these last few days... our pot luck dinner was fun and the chocolate cake went over pretty well... we also had a wine tasting at the beginning of our dinner so that in conjunction with the medicine I had taken left me a little loopy that evening... for all of you that were there I'm sure you noticed I was out of it... I'm hoping that is all due to the medication instead of me becoming depressed... it's hard to tell... it all feels about the same... the last time I felt like this was when I had post-partum depression after each of the kids were born... either way I don't like it... my mind has yet to really focus on any particular task and my short term memory seems to be shot... I forget details and it's getting a bit embarrassing that I can't remember to take items along to where they need to be or return a phone call... my head is full and I wish I could focus... I feel like I'm behind in a lot of areas and would like to be back at my usual capacity where I'm juggling three or four events and still making all of my deadlines... this has forced me to slow my life down and evaluate all of my priorities... I've now attending two of our Moms Club events where I haven't done a single thing except to show up... being out of the loop has been odd but I'll be back with all of that after the holidays... is it going to take me that long to recover? I know everyone recovers at their own pace and there is no timeline to be back at 100%... I want to be fine... I want to normal... or at least as normal as I was before... I also want to not feel completely exhausted all of the time... I can never get enough sleep these days even when I go to bed early... I'm looking forward to this weekend because this is the first Saturday I won't have to do too much and I can sleep in a bit... that's the part that worries me right now... I feel as though I'm slipping down the rabbit hole and won't be able to find my way back...